I’m a mean son of a bitch. I bark. I growl. Grrr! Don’t mess with me. You’ll regret it. My name is Killer.

Sometimes I hear music in the walls—a circus tune or the sound of a thousand tiny paws tapping at the window glass. The melody never stops. It twists and writhes, filling my head until I want to howl. Last night, I dreamed I was a cat, yowling at the moon, convinced it was made of bones. When I woke, I still wanted to climb the curtains.

The madness inside me boils over. I see red. The world turns strange; everything feels threatening, and I snap at shadows. Even my own tail—if I had one—wouldn’t be safe.

What do I look like?

Well, I’m not tall; my legs are short—bowed—big feet. Coat—tan with blotches of white.

Ugly—ugly. Bulldog ugly. My slobber bubbles like baking soda—giving me gas. Relief!

I have a stump for a tail… even the devil would be furious if someone cut off his tail.

Imagine: A devil without a tail… a head without horns… carrying a spoon and leaping over the moon.  Pure fucking madness.

Sometimes shadows crawl, and voices whisper from the walls. Maybe that’s just the madness talking, or maybe it’s real. Either way, I’m always ready to bite.

I know this: My shadow is plotting against me. I bark at it and try to bite it, but it always slips away, laughing in a voice only I can hear.

My owner took me to the veterinarian. The veterinarian removed my growler—the bastard. I’ll get him for this. I still have my teeth.

They’re sharp. I’ll shred both my owner and the veterinarian to pieces at the first chance I get. For now, I’ll roll over and play dead. My tongue is lolling out of my mouth.

But inside me—the madness keeps gnawing, chewing at my brain until I can barely tell friend from foe.

I once tried to dig a hole to the center of the Earth, convinced I’d find the world’s largest bone.

Instead, I found a family of ants who crowned me their king. For an entire afternoon, I ruled their sandy empire—until the rain washed it away.

During a storm—thunder and lightning—I started rolling on the ground; my owner chased me. I bit him—hard. He became raging mad—so mad he said, “I’ll fix you. I am having all your teeth removed, one by one… you’ll see who’s who.”

My owner is carrying a wire cage… It’s big.

I have an idea! A switcheroo—boo-hoo. I’ll take him to the zoo.

At the zoo, every animal pretends to be human. I’m mad… but I’m so clever. I masquerade as a human. Sometimes, when I look in the mirror, I see my owner’s eyes staring back at me. I’m confused.

Now, who’s who?