A mosquito turned to his wife one day and said, “You’re a blood-sucker.”

“And you’re an asshole,” the wife shot back.

“What?” the husband said. “No, no, no. You misunderstood me. I didn’t mean it like that. I was just stating a fact. You are a blood-sucker. You land on animals and poke them and siphon blood from them like drinking through a straw. I, however, am not a blood-sucker. I eat only plants and nectar. That’s all I was saying. I didn’t mean anything by it.”

“I didn’t mean anything by it, either,” she said. “I was also just stating a fact.”