Breakfast Menu

by September 3, 2023 0 comments

Back bacon rashers, I learn, having
exhausted the TV news and there being
no minibar, are 49 kcal per rasher.
Wow! Thousands of calories! Beware.

But This Isn’t Bacon comes in at only
a cool 20 kcal – though if it isn’t bacon,
what is it? And why does it feel
such a strong need for negative differentiation?

Premium sausages 114 kcal per sausage;
the alternative is rather more assertive –
Garden Gourmet Sensational Vegan Sausage
70 kcal. What does a sensational sausage do?

The eggs, interestingly, are counted per spoon,
including fried and boiled. How have they tested
the content of a spoonful of fried egg?
Perhaps I should stop this – madness awaits.

But I am arrested by two thoughts.
The first is that this is an ‘Unlimited Breakfast’
so in the end your calorific consumption
is entirely up to you (obviously).

The second comes as I study the back page
(my Kindle is recharging) and see that ‘photography
is for illustrative purposes only.’ This good-looking
meal is strictly 2D, then; no calories involved.

editors note:

There’s no accounting for calorie counts at the all-you-can-eat counter. – mh clay

Leave a Reply