Do not text your ex.

Do not text your crush.

Do not check her twitter.

Do not check his facebook.

Do not cut your hair.

Do not paint your bathroom.

Do not eat that entire bag of chips.

And while we’re at it,

Do not get on the scale.

Do not Google “chest pains.”

Do not bite your nails.

Do not disassemble the vacuum.

Do not sleep all day.

Get out of bed.

Get off your phone.

Do not text them.

Do Not.

DO NOT.