A COVID Kinda Christmas

by December 24, 2020 0 comments

Tis the night before Christmas,
When all across this land
A pandemic is raging
Foiling Yuletide plans.

We, in our face masks,
Nestling six feet apart.
While silently praying
This cough ain’t the start.

The stockings were hung
With sanitized care.
In case we’re infected,
That guilt we can’t bear.

Presents sit sterilized
Under fake plastic tree.
Medical-grade cellophane,
Insured COVID-free!

Hand sanitizers, face masks,
White latex gloves…
Gifted with care
For good health & for love.

The cookies & milk?
Nope, not this year.
One sneeze or sniffle
Brings irrational fear!

When what did we hear,
It brought such a shudder!
The sounds of St. Nick
It could be none other!

By the chimney we waited
But he broke down the door
As he pounced he announced,
“Santa’s merry no more!”

“Give me some meds! (cough)
Some cookies! A beer! (cough)
It’s 2020 for me too
And it’s been quite a year!”

The Fat Man kept coughing
His sickness was fast
We panicked & hid
Behind plexiglass.

The North Pole, it seems
Isn’t nearly as woke.
Santa’s unmasked?
This must be a joke!

“Santa, we’d love to have ya
But onward you must fly.
The gift that you’re giving
Just might make us die”

Coughing & sneezing
& blowing his elf nose,
He saw our fear, grabbed his gear
And left us exposed

When in his sleigh he proclaimed,
Before he swerved outta sight,
“COVID Christmas to all (cough-cough)
and to all a (cough) night!”

editors note:

Don we now our hazmat onesies, Fa la la la la la la la la… – mh clay

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