I am a traditional poet
I write sonnets and villanelles
I’ve got a publisher and an agent
To tell me what kind of stuff sells.

I am a conventional poet
I stick words together in lines
I measure the gaps between them
And make sure that everything rhymes.

Please don’t insult my intelligence
With your scribblings in free verse
And as for spoken word and slams
I can’t think of anything worse.

I am a living dead poet
My biography already released
And my collected works will follow
As soon as I am deceased.

editors note: To ensure acceptable accolades, best write your own. – mh clay