A Drunken Regret

by July 27, 2016 0 comments

You’ll just have to find some middle ground

someone tells me

but i am a pendulum in full swing
and the middle comes fast and frequently
and leaves just as quickly and as often

i am rushing from empty to full
i am gorging on His presence
and soon enough the same eyes that desire me
will cast me away with disgust
for He drinks me in lavishly and in excess
and like a true masochist, i let Him

and i ask all the questions from last time
because i will not be a drunken regret

i am sober
He is not
He growls with desire
i growl in frustration
the pain and fury i feel as He is entering my life
means it will all be amplified when He leaves it

this is a rabbit hole i know i shouldn’t go down
but i will because i am a silly rabbit

and now in the cleansing sunlight of a new day
i worry not about being His drunken regret
but about Him being my sober one

i’m wondering about how far the pendulum will swing this time
how far can i fill up before i just explode
and i skip the middle completely
to be suddenly left at empty

editors note:

Keep swinging to freedom; empty or full. (We welcome Jen to our crazy conspiracy of Contributing Poets with this submission. Read more of her madness on her new page – check it out.) – mh clay

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