Things are happening
in Nagoya, Japan
I know it.

Have you seen the fireworks
in Singapore;
the size of the sausage
in Bavaria?

I throw a cherry bomb
down my own toilet
and call the front
desk.

When the cops arrive
I get to give a general description
of the assailant.

I make it look
just like me
and see if they’re
smart enough
to figure it
out.