If you can multiply
the number of all-you-can-eat buffets
by the number of hands
you have shaken
by the first kisses with tongue
by the number of one night stands
it should come as quite
a surprise
that you are still
alive.

Consider your run of the mill germs
and all the mutated diseases
that dominate the nightly news
and you should not be surprised
that vaccinations
have overtaken
Viagra
in over the counter
demands.

You’re only as clean
as your dirtiest member
and 30 cent whores
with a purse full of mouthwash
are not reassuring.

I tend to lather
and rinse
at least twenty times
before I feel comfortable
in my surroundings.

Sometimes the skin breaks
and bleeds with effort
and then
I have to begin
all over again.