Brittany Griffiths

fiddling in the darkness
pushing up against the walls
in time, it was distended
like a sack of amniotic fluid
drowning in the excess of
too much material
an illusion of growth,
the protection of a womb,
allowing words to infiltrate
through the skin-lining
of the belly

she ate to feed the story
yet to be born
she savored the remaining moments
before it was out of her control
twisted like a knot inside
unable to detangle
the threads she’d bred
she continued living
until the pressure built
up beyond all comprehension
the patterns refused to connect
the lines of meaning never surfaced
and the breath of life within
was suppressed to nonexistence

In an instant, he dragged Linda to the basement with high hopes to find himself. The camera on the floor surrounded by inscrutable instruments covered in blood. A slow clock sat ticking as she clutched her locket to her chest. The score settled on small tragedies of sisterhood and the lost trance of what could but wouldn’t happen. There is no liberty for us in the implemented order of you. A threat manifest on the toppled staircase of regret. Enshrined far from comfort scratching at her bleeding wound. The warning bell rings in the sky-lit green. She sighs resigning as he tightens the chains unleashing all of his pitiful exhibitionist tendencies.

He said, “Wait. Don’t move, you’re mine” and took another drink around the corner where the particles of dust kicked up from the floorboards. With control, the warning bell tolls on the hour, expressing faith in a promise land where no one has been before. The sound chases after wishful thinking and moments of imagined freedom. This began with a narrative and devolved into disorder. She exhaled lament in pacified agreement while her healthy disguise crawled out of harmony into the belly of the old frontier. There was always subtle wonder within the destruction of mysterious darkness. Action poised with friction, a calm manipulation of everything. Time rolled out flat and the more she moved, the more it pulled her down. Her quiet cry to go home muffled like music in a padded room.

I put on a mask
who am I fooling
abstraction, regardless
it all comes out the same
what do I do with a moment?
the possibilities reside
in savory endlessness
let’s talk about
what my behavior would look like
if I slipped up for one second
“a fake”
who said that?
out of sync
with the fabric
is that what you thought would happen?
7 days ago
it’s unrelated
& seemingly irrelevant
I’ll let you fill in the blanks
there’s an idea in your head
what were you thinking?
maybe if we move a little bit
then, I’ll feel better
it’s a little more abstract
less personal
the opposite –
is that what you were going for?
I propose
a vulnerable maneuver
grafted onto expectations
no craft –
are you ready to ensue?
did you see that car passing swiftly by you?
I laugh –
no, did you?
it was the corner of the eye
you get the beers
I got the shot
but what’s the difference
this is to my fellow instrument

Hey –

(a hand on my shoulder)

Hey –
It’s going to be a short while longer
The machine takes several minutes to warm up

(the modem blinks a red eye after sleep
three-prong stemming
when there is work to be done)

Hey –
Are you okay?
There is water behind the counter

(the mumble rises through my shoes
laughter in the dark
right outside the room
the things they say in secret)

Hey –
This paper is too thin
Try to fix it by keeping a distance

(a woven hum from somewhere below
trapped under boards
made of paper, made of tree roots)

Hey –
It’s 25% off after fifty
More is cheaper

(the backward wire vibrates the cord
of a rubber sole that peels on contact
to toe the water)

Hey –
Remember the time
This looked familiar

(step into the clutch of a close feeling
a frayed, threaded carpet burn
scar of value)

she removed the lens
when the sidewalk shift
scraped the caked mud
off her feet
along the line,
square crossing sign,
reaping rubber meat
I tell you not
what flashing lights
will do to worsen sleep
dreaming of a narrow alley
dark & incomplete
a landline signal
low-fi & weathered
briny trigger
against the grain
sparkling in the night
trying to find the way
it goes up
a green cylinder
in my pocket
by way of
negligence
& mixed violations
inclined to capture a moment
on the cusp
of happening
it’s easier to tell
defiance from
choice of chance
to extend
a piece of yourself
releasing the tense
evolution of
unconscious recollection
open to suggestion

ruminating
things come slowly
pass the time
stare
at nothing

suppurating
surface
–>> seizure <<–

abrupt convulsions
jittery
grand mal experience

it effects –

“electrical changes in the brain“

she read that on the Internet
somewhere

she thinks she is dying
debt compounding

she returns to normal
continues on

following day
purchases
a 10-year term
life insurance policy
conscience cleared
pellucid sky
waiting for death

meanwhile…

the sun sets on an indifferent landscape

Diaphragm vibrations
Tongue solipsism
Eye apparatus
Eardrums
Apparent disconnection
To be
Not to be
Methodological contrast
Categorical comparisons
Create definitions
Conscious pigeonholes
Work human verse
Solid space
Relationships
One without the other
Impossible
Lost attention
Interval ignorance
Melody steps
A note into the next
Marked transition
Permanence unachieved
Vanity of vanities
Vanity, vanity
Tribal history
Human ferment
Seeking deliverance
World of change
Unattached
Unborn
Unoriginated
Unformed
Essential awakening
Samsara
The wheel –
Return
To
Everyday
Life